Is there a reliable way out? The short answer should always be “yes”, as difficult as this may be to imagine. It must seem that the odds are stacked against you at the moment but this is in no small part the product of the preconceptions that you take into any interaction with others, particularly the historical “baggage” that is obviously difficult to shake off. The harder you try to break this pattern, the harder it becomes; you clam up, become shy and awkward, and convince yourself that you would be better off alone. Without a more detailed assessment it would be unwise to rule out social anxiety or indeed depression; but many of these definitions are quite fluid anyway, so let's leave the labels to one side and look at the facts.
I have some very good news. You look quite different to others than the way you imagine. Nothing in your behaviour advertises you as bleakly as you fear. You may be a little reserved; shy even, but no collective decision has been taken to cast you into the wilderness. A good therapist will help you dispel many of the historical preconceptions that are holding you back, and as your confidence increases, so your sense of depression and isolation will lift.
I would propose a behavioural program with you, encouraging you to reformat many of your maladaptive beliefs, then follow that up with some basic skills to increase your self-confidence and self-esteem. Social engagement will cease to be a nightmare, and become a pleasure that you actively seek.
Report this post
You must be a HealthShare member to report this post.
to your account or
now (it's free).