Sadly, like many others, you waited and hoped for a positive change, however, your partner's self-centred and exploitative behaviour and lack of reciprocity, left you in the cold. Regretfully, you obviously were unable to break off the relationship which was probably the result of your strong attachment needs if not dependence on your partner for most of your needs.
It is apparent that your partner's exploitative behaviours were callous and remorseless and with narcissistic and antisocial personality features. This relationship would never work out because you were caught in a web of deceitful manipulative behavioural patterns; your ex-partner was the one orchestrating the moves.
You are a pleaser, a person who accommodates to others, a person who appears to be compliant, a person who was hopeful, but you finally realised the futility of your relationship.
You have to focus on your grief, you need to somehow take care of the debts which now you have to pay. You have a lot of work to do to recover from this traumatic relationship. You will have to pick up the pieces, work through your grief/loss and trauma, and eventually recover from your abusive traumatic experience.
You will benefit from seeing a seasoned clinical psychologist who does more than CBT; a clinical psychologist who is trained and experienced in relationship therapy and psychotherapy. You have a lot of tranferential material to bring to therapy but I feel that you can work through your pain and loss.
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