I am new to this site also. I have been fighting with depression and anxiety since I was a teenager (now 39). I know all my warning signs, know what I should be doing, tried every (well a lot anyway!) drug out there from anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, lithium, valium, etc, etc. At the moment I'm not taking anything (except Valium). I just don't know any more if anything will work. Done the counselling - psychologist, psychiatrist, GP, Social workers, Carers. Done the self-esteem course. Somehow I seem to still be in the same spot - going up and down like a yo-yo. I have a partner who I know I love but I just don't feel it. I have two beautiful daughters, 17 & 19, who I know I love even more than my partner, but again I just don't know if I can feel it. All I feel is miserable, angry, frustrated, tired, lonely, depressed, etc. I can feel these feelings no problem!! I just am at the end of my line. Just don't know what to do anymore. I am completely alone. No family in the same town as me (except for my youngest daughter and my partner), and my only true friend moved away a few months ago. I have no one to talk to and no where to turn. I sit and cry by myself and keep trying but I don't know how much longer I can fight on. I'm so tired of every day being such a battle. I wish I could make it all go away and just be happy like most other people. I'm not naive and think that everyone has it all fun and roses but I know sure as anything it shouldn't be like the life I have been given.
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