It sounds like you've paid a very high price for creating the life you want! Your mother perhaps has very particular and traditional beliefs about separation and divorce (that they are not OK) and about what a ‘good woman’ does (maybe she believes that it is a woman's job to make the marriage work, and if she doesn't she has failed or done the wrong thing). It's possible your mother even thinks that the most loving thing she can do for you is show you her disapproval in order to influence your decisions back to the ‘right path’. Hearing your story, I also wonder what your mother's experience of her own marriage has been. Is she happy in her own relationship, or has she trapped herself with the idea that if she's unhappy, or her needs aren't being met, then it's her fault and she just has to work harder at it?
I am speculating of course - but if this is the case, it would be tremendously confronting to her to see you courageously following your heart and choosing a happy and fulfilling life.
The reason I would encourage you to have a guess at what would make sense of your mother's behaviour is NOT to dimish how distressing this is for you, but to suggest that even though her response is difficult, and not meeting your needs in any way, it is not that she doesn't love you.
Understanding where your Mum may be coming from (without having to agree with it in any way) can translate into the possibility of having different conversations with her - for example, you might try letting her know that you appreciate she is trying to show her love and concern for you by expressing her disapproval, but in fact what you need from her is acceptance, even if she does not approve or understand the choices you have made.
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