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  • Q&A with Australian Health Practitioners

    Difficulty dealing with my wifes depression, please help.

    Related Topics
    Depression Mental Health Relationships
    My wife has severe depression and has suicidal thoughts. I dont know how much more i can take. It has been over 5 years and i cant see the light at the end of the tunnel. I feel if i left it would push her over the edge. Is this a good reason to stay? have no answers.
    • 2 answers
    • Dr Melanie Strang
    • Margie Ulbrick
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    Thanks

    Dr Melanie Strang

    Counsellor

    It sounds as if your situation is a really tough one and I think it is really important that you have support too. If you have not already, it would be a good idea to go and see your GP and ask for a referral to a counsellor or psychologist so that you have the support of  a proffessional. Being a carer for someone with a severe illness can lead to burnout. Do you get some time to yourself? Self-care needs to be a priority because you matter too.

    It may also be a good idea to seek couples counselling- however to  do this both you and your wife need to be well enough to engage in this process. A counsellor can help you decide together what the future of the relationship holds for you both.

    Another resource you may find helpful is Mensline. This free telephone support service for men has counsellors available 24/7. Their telepone number is1300789978.

    Take care.

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  • Margie Ulbrick

    Counsellor

    I am a Melbourne Relationship Counsellor and Family Lawyer who is skilful in helping people get out of the pain of relationship distress and create … View Profile

    Is your wife's depression/suicidal condition reason to stay in your marriage?

    Both of you need to get professional assistance and if you cannot get your wife to see a Counsellor then at least you can do so. Get all the support you can and this will help you become very clear on what is your responsibility and what is not: on what you can change and what you cannot.

    If you look after your own mental health and develop supports for yourself you may be surprised at the ways in which change is possible in your relationship. Couples counselling or individual counselling for your relatinship issues can both be enormously valuable.

    Finally, if you suspect your wife is at risk of suicide then it is imperative that you call Lifeline and also speak to your GP.

    All the best.

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