4. Why is intimacy so important in a relationship?
Intimacy in our culture is often equated with sexual intimacy, whereas intimacy as defined in the psychological state is something a little bit different. It talks about our ability to relate closely to and to function up closely to another person. In a good relationship, this needs to happen in a variety of ways. For example, doing the washing up, having a nice evening out together, sharing values that we stand for regarding children, money, quality of life, and even religious values. As well as those, there is also the very important times for couples known as “sexual sharing”.
So, its good to have enough time together in a good relationship, to have a broad basis of intimacy. Otherwise, when the sexual attraction wears thin we might discover that there is not much between the two anyhow. In my work with couples, young couples particularly, the relationship sometimes seems to die because it was founded on too much of one thing. Some people say that real relationships begin when the romance wears off and that is the time when the relationship begins to be built on quite serious values. So that is something to keep in mind too. So intimacy needs time and a variety of qualities to stand the test of time, and to last for a good length of time.
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