I am terribly sorry to hear about your loss. Losing a child is a huge loss, something that you probably never get over completely. However, you can learn to live with this loss.
Grieving takes time and is best done in relationship. What I mean to say is that if you can grief this loss together with your partner, the father of your baby, as well as other family members who may be involved (other children you may have, your parents, your partner's parents and so on) it will make it slightly easier to cope with.
Allow yourself to grief. Often people think that they should be “strong”, that they shouldn't be crying as much as they do. I believe crying is a great way of expresssing the feelings and it is a natural part of the grieving process. And there are other parts to grieving as well. There will undoubtedly come a time when you might feel angry, when you might go in denial, or feel depressed. These are all part of the stages of mourning and are universal. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross first described the stages in her book “on Death and Dying” back in 1969, you can find more information on this at the following website: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/
I would also recommend that you get some help from outside the family and friends circle. Find yourself a therapist who can help you. As a somatic psychotherapist I could help you work through the various stages and step back into life again, by working with both the body and the mind. Feel free to give me a call so we can have a chat to help you determine if you want to go down this path. Or you could talk to your GP and get them to refer you to a psychologist.
I wish you all the best at this very difficult stage in your life. My thoughts are with you.
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