Without doing a more thorough assessment, it is difficult to get an accurate picture of what may or may not be happening for you and I risk going off track.
I would be curious to know whether or not you can recall feeling the way you do now as a child? Oftentimes people unknowingly use coping strategies that recreate familiar feelings, even if the feelings are painful.
One possible pattern that may or may not be applicable here is that of emotional deprivation. People with emotional deprivation often feel lonely, bitter and depressed. Sometimes they feel that they do not get enough affection and warmth, attention or that they do not get opportunities to express deep emotions.
People with emotional deprivation often do not ask people for what they need emotionally and act stronger than the feel underneath. Sometimes they self-sacrifice and focus excessively on meeting the needs of others at the expense of their own needs. Sometimes they choose significant others who, for one reason or another, cannot or do not want to give emotionally. Sometimes people become overly demanding and angry when their needs are not met. Ironically, these coping styles serve to perpetuate their emotional deprivation.
If this is you, it is important to become aware of your emotional needs, e.g., nurturance, empathy and protection, and to accept these needs as natural. If you can learn to choose appropriate people and then ask for what you need in appropriate ways, people will give to you emotionally.
If this resonates with you and you would like to know more, I recommend a book called Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey Young & Janet Klosko.
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