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  • Q&A with Australian Health Practitioners

    Emotional Disassociation

    Hi all, For the past couple of years, I've been living in a kind of emotionally-deprived dream state. I have emotions, and clearly I am capable of thought, but both emotions and thought seem completely disconnected from reality. When I'm feeling 'sad', for example, I'll have the physical reactions -- crying, tightness in the chest etc. However, inside my mind there will be no feeling of sadness whatsoever. My mind is acutely aware that it should be feeling the same sadness that my body feels. I don't know what's been causing this, nor whether it's something that I should see someone about. I was hoping I could get some general advice on what might be going on? If it's relevant, I have a history of stress/anxiety, with symptoms like sharp chest pains and waking up crying etc. Until last year, I was in a long-term relationship -- which was loving, but incredibly stressful. My partner had PTSD and depression, and I was constantly afraid she'd react badly to something I said. Thanks!
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    I have been working in Eltham, Melbourne as a relationship and family counsellor for over twelve years. I draw on current theory and research about … View Profile

    It sounds like you may have developed a unique way of coping with situations where you have perhaps not felt safe to fully connect to your feelings. Disconnecting from body sensations and emotions can be an ingenious short term survival strategy where people close to you may react negatively to you expressing those emotions. However, as a longer term way of being in relationship to your own emotions, it has serious shortcomings! I would recommend that you seek out counselling with someone who is skilled at helping you work on safely reconnecting body sensations, emotions and thoughts. While you may not have thought of this as a trauma response, it most often develops in response to trauma - particularly the trauma of abuse or neglect, whether physical, emotional or sexual. 

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