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Shared Experiences
Have you been through something like this?
Conversation started by miss_teach
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Hi,
I am new to this but feel the need to reach out. I started university six years ago with four kids under the age of 12.
I was a full time student, mother and wife. At the time my husband had a pretty good job with a four days on four days off roster, which would have worked well with my studies giving me time to study, but he changed his job, and worked 6 days a week alternating between night shift and day shift.
The lions share of everything fell upon my shoulders. At the time my mums health began to detoriate, she was diagnosed with a respiriotory aiways disease, and i was also her primary carer.
After awhile i couldnt cope and had my first ever anxiety attack , i awoke in the middle of the night unable to breath, my heart racing , dizziness, i woke my husband we thought i was having a heart attack, i got myself to the bathroom, where i vomitted everywhere, amongst other things. Then i felt fine, we thought it could have been food poisoning, or a reaction to a cleaning chemical, we just didnt know.
The next day i got myself to the doctor where after a lengthy discussion he diagnosed Generalised Anxiety Disorder and i went on to Escilatopram.
Life unravels, I broke my ankle during my thrid year at university and spend 6 weeks in hospital and a further 6 in a wheel chair, within a few weeks of being out of hospital i then went onto do a third year placement in a school, the teacher was horrible and a real bully! I couldnt wait to get out of there.
During my fourth and final year i was half way through my 8 week practicum and my mothers health went down hill and she passed away.
That was the end of my prac for me. My university said i would have to do my prac the following year, during that time i encountered two work collegues who were so brutal and nasty that i had ti leave my job.
I tried to do another internship but i encounted a nasty teacher who had been teaching for 25 years and was incredibly mean, making me go to school at 7 am each morning even though school did not start till nine. She bullied, pushed and haressed me till i walked out on my prac and recieved a failing grade.
Im now due to start another prac in 6 weeks, the thought of it sends me in a spin, and im dizzy and sick and unable to cope with the thought, its taking over every single moment of my life, I gave up taking the anti depressants two weeks before Christmas as I thought i was weak for taking them, and that i didnt need them anymore.
I want to be able to sort out things on my own, but like i said i am paralysed with fear, I dont know what to do. There is a part of me that doesnt want to do this prac, but then i would have failed massively and wasted those four years at uni.
Please help me I dont know what to do, Have you been through something like this? -
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beyondblue is a national, independent, not-for-profit organisation working to address issues associated with depression, anxiety and related disorders in Australia.beyondblue is a bipartisan initiative of … View Profile
Hi Miss teach,
Wow you have been through a really difficult time with a whole raft of stressors placed upon you and as could be expected they have taken their toll. Just like physical health problems, if you put too much stress on your body, you make it vulnerable to illness or injuries, in which case it is common to take medications to asssit with the process of recovery.
As you are about to go into another stressful period with your next prac, I would encourage you to take all the armour and support you can with you to assit you. This includes having a good diet, having time for yourself (and planning this with your husband) and the medcation for anxiety can also assist you. Its good to remembr that antidepressants which are also used for the treatment of anxiety are safe, effective and not addictive - talk to your GP about the type of medication they prescribed. It is no different to taking antibiotics when you have an infection to help clear things up - we dont consider someone weak if they use medication for this - or asthma or diabetes. It is no different for mental health conditions, your body is unders stress and it can be helpful. It is often useful to get a good understanding of anxiety disorders, what they are, and how the body works when these occur, there are some great factsheets and information on the beyondblue website - or you can talk to a mental health professional on the beyondblue infoline who will be able to send you some information (1300 22 4636).
There are also a range of great online programs to help you develop strategies to manage anxiety generally and deal with stressful situations. There is a directory of thes on the beyondblue website - and they are high quality programs and free. Toghether these will help asssit you to take control of the anxiety symptoms. A lot of the strategies will also help you develop techniques to take control in other stressful situations which may arise - which may be particulalrly helpful as you prac approaches.
Good luck,
NicoleReport this post
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If you have had any childhood pain/abuse/neglect this may be surfacing right now. When I get into a negative state I find that I then attract more negative energy to me - and therefore more adversity and pain. My suggestion is for you to find a holistic therapist (Look under Naturaltherapypages) as the counsellors who only use CBT (thinking) doesn't get to the core. I've found NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) is helpful and EFT (tapping on the meridians is especially good for panic and anxiety) check these online and make your own decisions about what fits for you. Many people do not know about these other supports. There is also someone who deals with Codependency which a great deal of people have unknowingly which comes from negative childhoods and can be helped. Breathing and Meditation are also very helpful and useful to support you in the moment. Hope some of this helps.
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