Hi, it sounds like you are really struggling, you are not alone. Sometimes it seems life keeps throwing things at people and they have difficulty getting a break.The big thing for you is to get help now, there is no shame in asking for help, everyone needs help from time to time so seek out some assistance. A good place to start is
LifeLine Ph 13 11 14 http://www.lifeline.org.au/Get-Help/
The Salvos 1300 659 467 http://suicideprevention.salvos.org.au/need-help-now
Give them a call and have a chat to them. They can point you the right direction.
Or make an appoointment with your GP and let her/him know what is going on for you - be honest.
Another suggestion I'll make is around community. I find that often when people feel alone their problems are magnified and seem as though they'll never get them sorted. If you do feel alone and disconnected, if you don't have friends or family you can talk to and get some support from then consider giving your local minister a call. They are usually a good point of contact in your local community and can probably
get you connected. There is also your local communtiy and mental health services (just Google) so there are plenty of options.
When you have lost hope you need to surround yourself with people who care for you and who will support you, all you need to do is reach out.
Don't give in, keep pushing on, get some help. I wish you all the best.
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