I am 48 years old and feeling like I have be living in hell for the past 3 years, Before I had my daughter at age 36 I suffered severely with PMS then magically it disappeared after birth of daughter, before daughter had been on every type of contraceptive pills , devices , arm implants etc most having little or no effect on my PMS and sometimes making it worse. After approx 8 years after child birth the symptoms started to come back. I also noticed that my cycle was getting longer and longer, Presenting to the GP I was given antidepressants 10 different varieties in the last 3 years most the dose was increased when I presented back to GP with no improvement , they added in products such as duromine to keep me awake because the side effects of the antidepressant, It has steadily got worse in the last year and one thing I noticed and kept reporting to GP that time between menstruation was getting longer and longer sometimes 45 days then 60 days then 90 days, and during this time my especially emotional state got worse the only time in the last 12 months that I feel my old self is when I am menstruating. The last 3 months until 3 days ago when I got a period I have been in hell I have been totally depressed, anxiety you name it I had it until I wanted to die I could nto live my life like this, presented to emergency dept as I was not in a safe place , spoke to psychologist and psychiatrist gave me Valium and told to see GP and look at hormonal. Was put on HRT no change (kliogest) told to double dose no change referred to gynecologist who changed HRT to premarin .625 mg and provera 5mg take two premarin and 1 provera no change in mood went back to GP double the dose of both and here is another antidepressant. I also had a pelvic ultra sound, which showed to benign type cysts in right ovarie and a fibroid in uterus Symptoms got continually worse and I discontinued HRT and Antidepressent, The only benefit I got from taking the HRT was I increased in bra size from a c cup to a DD in 3 weeks if you call that a benefit. Both the HRT and all the antidepressants I have been able to withdraw cold turkey with no change in problem no change to mental state but at least had stopped the side effects of the drugs I was on. Again as it has been three months since last period cannot live with myself any longer presented to Emergency, again they this time placed me on an antidepressant and antipsychotic which helped as the only thing I could do was sleep, over the phone was told to reduce antipsychotic did so next day period arrived and all emotional disturbances gone, feel great , so went again and saw psychiatrist and he could not believe the change, So today I had a psychiatrist order blood tests for female hormones and told me I might as well take a tick tack for all the good the antidepressants and anti psychotics were doing so drop them as well, find a new GP today get a urgent referral to a gynecologist who was obviously a little more sympathetic to my problem and may not put me on a general HRT but more that would suit me, easier said than done, I have also been seeing a natropath who all along has felt it is hormonal and that I am in estrogen overload and by giving such huge doses of HRT have compounded the problem. My fear is when this period finishes the cycle will start again and how bad I get will depend when the next period arrives. The psychiatrist has ruled out that I am suffering any mental problem that he can cure he is going to show blood test results done today compared to blood test results from 3 weeks ago to a Gynecologist and see if he has any advice. I would say I feel a little let down by the system, I have lost a lot of faith in the medical system other than mental health as they are the only ones putting there hands up and saying we cannot fix you we can give you drugs when you get low to calm or get you to a safe place but his exact words today cannot give you a drug to keep your period going so you keep happy. Where do you turn to ? I believe I just do not fit into the system and it is to hard. I am an ex nurse so a little knowledge in dangerous but helpful when told to take 2.4mg of premarin is probably not the smartest thing to do in my case, I believe I am in estrogen overload and pouring more into myself makes me worse not better. By begging I was able to get into a GP that does not except new patients but known as being very good, I have spoken to menopause clinics not in my state but over the phone and they were going to send bio identical troches but again were doing this without blood tests they would do those after they had me started, It is not the money so much as much I cannot touch feel or see these people other than by phone and gave me the impression they were basically going to be all progesterone. Not that I think they are wrong by any means I feel a that is a better answer than the amount of estrogen I was asked to take. The one symptom I do not have have are hot flushes now I enjoy the heat so maybe I do not notice but other women tell me I would know if I had of had one. To have to present to mental Health as the depression is that bad it gets to the stage I cannot live like this and them believing they cannot fix me but they can give me a safe place and calming drugs , valium etc to take the edge off this is all they can do, No antidepressant from any group has helped just get the bad side effects, where do we go who can help us, The person I have most faith in at this time is the naturopath but do understand nothing will be fixed over night but 3 years…I am in terror of this period finishing because how long till the next one and what state will I be in for the months waiting for it to appear again to get the week relief. My major symptoms are emotional all of them depression, anxiety, irritability , inability to make decisions, joint pain, chronic fatigue. I suppose I have written an essay as I am at my wits end on where to get help so I am hoping someone can help it is a bit like i am walking on the inside of a circle and I just need someone to show me where the exit door is i will walk through but I just cannot find that person. would prefer to be menstruating all the time at least my head , my emotions are intact.
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