This experience has been posted in these health communities: Eating Disorders
I suffer from anorexia and am wondering if anyone has experienced of overcome the total confusion on wanting/not wanting to get better?
Conversation started by leesa5Hi,
Just wondering if anyone has experienced of overcome the
total confusion on wanting/not wanting to get better.
I fight so hard and tell myself to get better because in the
future I do want children and my body to have periods again but then I look at
myself and not being so thin that I need to be in hospital that I tell myself I
am not a good anorexic.
I feel guilty for wanting to get better and usually cant
admit this.
I feel lost and confused about how I should feel.
Comments
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The Butterfly Foundation was founded in August 2002 by Claire Vickery who found many 'gaps' in the public health system for those experiencing eating disorders. ... View profileHi Lisa,
The way that you feel is not uncommon and what you are experiencing is something that many people with an eating disorder go through. I firstly want to acknowledge that how you are feeling now is real but that you can overcome this.
You can receive help at The Butterfly Foundation, and we are there to speak with you over the phone or face to face with one of our intern psychologists. It may be easier first to make the call to our support line on 1800 33 4673 or book an appointment to meet at our offices in Crows Nest Sydney if you are in the area.
It is also a good thing to be seeking medical assistance and talking with a professional about this. That is the first positive step towards recovery. Our encouragement would be to make contact with The Butterfly Foundation and someone will be able talk further with you. Reply to this post | Report -
Hi Lisa
I am going through similar thoughts/feelings. I have had 5 hospital admissions over the last 18 mths & have been going really well at home until now. Through each admission I was constantly thinking I want to get better, I'm sick of living like this but I don't want the weight gain that goes with it. Why can't I just get my head fixed & my body stay like this?"
People tell me I need to get better for my kids - this is something I'm constantly battling with & feel extremely guilty for because ED is sometimes louder (especially at the moment)
Congratulations for admitting you feel this way - it is a positive step in the right direction. Good luck with your recovery, it's a bumpy road but one that does have an end xoxo Reply to this post | Report -
Hi Lisa
I have only realised I have had an eating disorder for the last 2 years. I was so surprised to read you post as I felt like I had written it myself. I experience the exact same struggles every day. I am despearte to get better as my husband and I want to start a family. However, the eating disorder is fighting me harder than ever before and I feel like I am failing rather than getting better and putting on weight so I can have an opportunity to have children. I feel very lost and confused. I don't know what else to do. I see a dietician, therapist and have the app “recovery record” but don't seem to be getting any better. I am so sorry to hear that you are experiencing the same. It is so so so cruel!
I wish you all the luck in the world and if you find something helpful to get you back on the road to recovery please let me know.
By the way, I strongly suggest you download the app “Recovery Record” It reminds me to eat and my dietician can see my daily meals. Reply to this post | Report
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